"What the fuck is a
BMGT?" A
BMGT,
ignoramus, is a BLT with mixed greens instead of lettuce. The traditional iceberg lettuce fucking sucks some serious ass and has zero nutritional value. Mixed greens, on the other hand, are tasty and good for you. Chicks dig healthy shit. Let's begin:
Choose your bread wisely. Here I have a multi-grain from "Dave's Killer Bread" which is a bit of an unsettling name as "Dave" is a convicted felon. No joke. So fittingly his bread is of a murderously good nature.
The layering of the
BMGT is complex and
pre-meditated. Start with your toasted bread and slap on some mayo. No, not on both sides of the slice you fucking idiot. Put down some mixed greens, upon which place two strips of
bacon, then two slices of tomato, two more strips of
bacon, and finally some more mixed greens. This way your tomato will not make your bread all mushy. Everyone hates mushy bread. Eat it.
Choose your bread wisely. Here I have a multi-grain from "Dave's Killer Bread" which is a bit of an unsettling name as "Dave" is a convicted felon. No joke. So fittingly his bread is of a murderously good nature.
The layering of the BMGT is complex and pre-meditated. Start with your toasted bread and slap on some mayo. No, not on both sides of the slice you fucking idiot. Put down some mixed greens, upon which place two strips of bacon, then two slices of tomato, two more strips of bacon, and finally some more mixed greens. This way your tomato will not make your bread all mushy. Everyone hates mushy bread. Eat it. 
4 comments:
i love the line "chicks dig healthy shit"!
It's funny because it's true
that sounds great yum
I completely agree with you about iceberg lettuce. It's not fit for most applications where real lettuce is called for. However, I came to an epiphany regarding iceberg lately. It's just crunchy water. Sometime crunchy water can be refreshing, especially if you are not in the mood for a Slurpee.
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