Thursday, May 14, 2009

Lakefront Brewery - Organic ESB


Lakefront brewery is not from the Pacific Northwest; It is from Wisconsin, Minnesota, Michigan or some other shitty state like that. There is a bottle shop near my house and the owners are from the armpit of America so they carry a few of their "beers" and I figured I would give one a try. Bad idea. Contrary to popular belief, if you slap the label "organic" on your beer, it does not cover up the shitty brewing. This beer sucks some serious ass. I actually considered pouring it out at one point. I cannot believe your microbrews blow this bad Wisconsin, Minnesota, or Michigan. Are they all like this? What a cruel existence. I will never stray again my beloved Pacific Northwest. Please forgive me. 2 out of 5. Urinate on it then light it on fire.

10 comments:

Jessica said...

My royal indignation knows no bounds! Try some Surly or Summit next time and don't ever group Michigan and/or Wisconsin with Minnesota again!

ALN said...

Jessia,
I actually wrote this with you in mind and whatever crappy state you live in now. Your beer sucks. You wish you still lived out here.
Alex

Jessica said...

I only wish I still lived in Portland on those days when I think my life is lacking in gloomy weather and cat-calling hobos. Ok, ok, I do miss it. And the beer. But seriously, find yourself some Surly. That shit is tasty!
p.s. "Stuffed Burger"? It's called a Jucy Lucy and it was invented in the greatest city ever - MPLS!

ALN said...

I seriously doubt the stuffed burger was invented in MPLS, whatever the fuck that is. By the way Jucy Lucy sounds freaking nasty.

Jessica said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jucy_Lucy

ALN said...

If it is on Wikipedia it MUST be true.

Anonymous said...

Lakefront Brewery brewed in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, is for people who know good beer. It's not the "excuse for beer cat urine" that ignorant people (say, in the Pacific Northwest) are used to. Milwaukee knows beer. Milwaukee is beer.

Shut up and learn.

Tony
Madison, WI

ALN said...

Nope. It fucking sucks and so does Milwaukee or wherever the fuck it is from.

Anonymous said...

you're a douchebag. all of you capri pant wearing fixie riding hipster tools from the PNW think you are god's gift to brewing. get a life.

Cooking Asshole said...

Dear Anonymous/Pussy

Fucking loser. We own this shit and you know it. Your state sucks.