To make the sauce, mix ~1/3c mayonnaise with ~1/4c sour cream. Add juice from 1/2 of a lemon, a few dashes of Tabasco and two finely chopped pickles. Taste it. What does it need, genius. More lemon juice? More Tabasco? More pickles? Add whatever you think it needs. This is a good lesson for how to make your own shit and not have to rely on assholes like me. But I have such faith that you will still continue to fuck shit up that I will never become obsolete. You are my job security, dumbass. Also chop up some fresh garlic spears and sprinkle on the fish as seen above. Eat it.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Sauce for Blackened Catfish
I made some blackened catfish again last night but I wanted a nice sauce to chill the burn. I did not have too much on hand so I had to improvise a little. This will be another lesson from the series "what the fuck is in my kitchen?" Since you are too stupid to think for yourself, you can just follow my lead. Let's begin:
To make the sauce, mix ~1/3c mayonnaise with ~1/4c sour cream. Add juice from 1/2 of a lemon, a few dashes of Tabasco and two finely chopped pickles. Taste it. What does it need, genius. More lemon juice? More Tabasco? More pickles? Add whatever you think it needs. This is a good lesson for how to make your own shit and not have to rely on assholes like me. But I have such faith that you will still continue to fuck shit up that I will never become obsolete. You are my job security, dumbass. Also chop up some fresh garlic spears and sprinkle on the fish as seen above. Eat it.
To make the sauce, mix ~1/3c mayonnaise with ~1/4c sour cream. Add juice from 1/2 of a lemon, a few dashes of Tabasco and two finely chopped pickles. Taste it. What does it need, genius. More lemon juice? More Tabasco? More pickles? Add whatever you think it needs. This is a good lesson for how to make your own shit and not have to rely on assholes like me. But I have such faith that you will still continue to fuck shit up that I will never become obsolete. You are my job security, dumbass. Also chop up some fresh garlic spears and sprinkle on the fish as seen above. Eat it.
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13 comments:
Fish sucks ass. But at least you are funny.
just because you can't cook it right doesn't mean it sucks.
Your cooking rules. But those plates are fucking hideous. Did you borrow them shits from the grandmama next door?
You don't know how right you are.
Now, now! There's nothing wrong with my cooking. It's perfectly edible....
hehe!
Where have you been all my life??
I have a dirty secret to confess, however: I am a vegetarian.
Please love me anyway!
xo
That's okay. I make plenty of vegetarian dishes as my lady is of that persuasion.
Loved your guest post today. Outstanding recipe. I would like to teach math the same way. If I could be as frank with my language with the kiddos, I think that they might finally learn the damn quadratic formula!!
Just came over from Mr. Condescending's blog -- great guest post. You are the exactly the kind of person I need. I suck at cooking. My poor family suffers all the time. Mostly because I cook everything on high heat and don't really follow the directions -- leaving out things if I don't think I'll like them or forgot to buy them. I enjoy your direct and hilarious writing style.
@ Hit 40
Thanks! Quadra-what?
@Jenners
Thanks! Look through my previous posts and my future ones to learn concept cooking. It ends up being really easy. I promise. High heat can be a good thing if used properly.
Your blog is like culinary bootcamp. If you make it through, you're a badass.
"How do you 'eyeball' it?"
"Choke yourself, numbnuts! With my hand!"
Thanks! Full Metal Jacket is my favorite movie.
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