Monday, August 3, 2009

Cooking for Assholes Challenge - Third Crappiest Entry

This entry was submitted by Whit. I think this is pretty okay writing but the food is super low class and belongs on This is Why You're Fat. I can't say too many bad things about this entry since it contains pork and cheese. So without further adieu, I bring you Whit:

I was pondering your challenge with much ferocity when you threw down the gauntlet. I knew a dish would have to be created so magical that it would stun man and child alike into startled silence. A dish that would turn women into heaving puddles of post-orgasmic bliss. A dish of the times. Something that would be affordable yet tasty. And, of course, (for my money, at least) a dish with credentials like those would have to include two of my favorite ingredients: pork and cheese.

I came up with the simple idea which my chef-in-residence, Aaron, embellished upon and made sing.

Nice Home Depot backsplash and marmoleum countertops.

I give you Breakfast Mac. Plain old elbow macaroni boiled in seasoned water to just the super side of al dente. About half of a good-sized yellow onion diced and grilled before being joined by a pound of ground breakfast sausage. A sauce of butter, milk, white cheddar and a little cream cheese for texture. Mix together, layer into a casserole dish, cover in toasted bread crumbs and grated parm and bake at 350 for a little while.

The crust has a little bite to it. The cheese holds the mac and sausage and onions together in a warm, gooey embrace. It's magic. Too bad you didn't think of it but, if you had, they wouldn't refer to you as loser and snicker all those hateful things under breath when you pass.

Eat it,
Whit

1 comment:

'Cuz I Felt Like It! said...

Oh hell yeah! The girls in the trailer park will LOVE this one! I can't wait to make it!