We all remember the first time my woman made a tomato salad, right? Good. Well, tonight she made a different one with the beautiful heirlooms we picked up at the farm today. Want the recipe? Too damn bad. Figure it out for yourself, dipshit. This is not rocket surgery. "Please! It looks SO good!" Let me ask her for you. Nope, she says to go fuck yourself. "Come on! Don't be such a dick!" Fine. Here it is just to get your whiny ass off my back. Whisk 2tbl red wine vinegar, 1tsp Dijon, 1tsp salt, 1/2tsp sugar, 1/2tsp black pepper. Slowly drizzle in 1/4c extra virgin olive oil while continuing to whisk. Mix with a shitload of heirloom tomatoes and mozzarella balls. Sprinkle with kosher salt, cover, and fridge it for 15 min. Finally, toss some flat leaf parsley on top. Eat it.
14 comments:
That looks really good!!
Shit that does look good
mmm pass some toasted bread and put that on top!
thank you all for boosting my woman's ego. that is exactly what she needed...not.
Fresh tomato salad, yum. I think even I could do this.
Doubtful...
It looks like your wife can give you a run for your money. How do we know she isn't the one making the meals and you just stealing all the glory?
shhhh!
what's the brown shit in the picture?
I can only assume you are referring to the deep red heirloom tomatoes, genius.
rocket science, you fuck.
It's a joke, retard. Rocket science + brain surgery = rocket surgery. Grow a brain.
i was also joking. i was just being an asshole because this is, well, cooking for assholes.
Well I am glad we are both on the same page...
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