So last night I had a friend stop by with two bags of groceries and an ulterior motive. The shit eating grin on his face should have tipped me off. He had purchased what he figured was food that I would be unable to pair in any sort of way and he was ready for some schadenfreude action. There was a salmon fillet, squid, bok choy, a New Mexican Chili, and a pink lemon. Good luck trying to fuck with me asshole. Let's begin:
First I prepared my salmon as it would take the longest to cook. This beautiful specimen would have been amazing unadulterated but I needed to use my "secret ingredients." I sliced up the New Mexico chili and the pink lemon and placed them on top of the salmon. I thew it in a 400 deg oven for about 30 minutes (I think).
Next I started to stir fry my squid in some Chinese cooking wine, soy sauce, and toasted sesame oil. I wanted to give it a little pan-Asian flair to win over the judges. Cook your squid for a few minutes over medium heat and then toss in your bok choy leaves and stalks until wilted.
So here is my squid appetizer. Nothing too fancy but it was very tasty with the cooking sauce I made. The bok choy was perfect and the squid was even better. You cook that shit too long and you will not even be able to chew the fucker up.
Out comes the salmon and at which point I yell "in your face motherfucker!" Eat it.
First I prepared my salmon as it would take the longest to cook. This beautiful specimen would have been amazing unadulterated but I needed to use my "secret ingredients." I sliced up the New Mexico chili and the pink lemon and placed them on top of the salmon. I thew it in a 400 deg oven for about 30 minutes (I think).
Next I started to stir fry my squid in some Chinese cooking wine, soy sauce, and toasted sesame oil. I wanted to give it a little pan-Asian flair to win over the judges. Cook your squid for a few minutes over medium heat and then toss in your bok choy leaves and stalks until wilted.
So here is my squid appetizer. Nothing too fancy but it was very tasty with the cooking sauce I made. The bok choy was perfect and the squid was even better. You cook that shit too long and you will not even be able to chew the fucker up.
Out comes the salmon and at which point I yell "in your face motherfucker!" Eat it.
10 comments:
Awww man....I can't believe I wasn't invited over for this one! GAH!
THAT'S OUR BOY! Way to punk that bee-yotch!
=^..^=
Maybe you should try out for "Chopped" on the Food Network
Your blog title is music to my ears. Make me something else, I hate salmon.
Fuck you asshole. You will eat the salmon and you will like it.
At least put some brown gravy on it, a few paper umbrellas.
Paper umbrellas are a fantastic idea!
Yum - I am salivating and can hardly wait to try your salad
What the hell is chinese cooking wine.
A special type of cooking wine that adds that extra flair to Asian dishes.
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