This morning I decided to make a white trash version of everyone's favorite breakfast: eggs benedict. If there are any of you idiots out there who actually know how to make eggs benedict (and I seriously fucking doubt that) don't give me shit because I am doing it wrong. I am doing it wrong on purpose, you fucking jackass. Let's begin:
Make some
bacon. Keep the pan with the grease over low heat. Boil a pot of water and reduce to a simmer. Splash in some white vinegar and a little salt. Crack your egg into a small bowl and very carefully slide your egg into the simmering water for about 3-4 minutes.
Remove it from the water with a slotted utensil and when it cools remove the crap that makes it look nasty (as seen above). Toast a dollar store hamburger bun and slather it with mayo. Set aside.
In a large bowl whisk three whole eggs (if you really care enough, only use the yolks) to foam with a little fresh lemon juice and a splash of water. Whisk your egg mixture into the bacon grease over very low heat. Whisk continuously for about five minutes. Remove from heat, salt it, and let thicken slightly.
Slap all that shit together and park your butt down for the big race. Eat it.
Make some bacon. Keep the pan with the grease over low heat. Boil a pot of water and reduce to a simmer. Splash in some white vinegar and a little salt. Crack your egg into a small bowl and very carefully slide your egg into the simmering water for about 3-4 minutes.
Remove it from the water with a slotted utensil and when it cools remove the crap that makes it look nasty (as seen above). Toast a dollar store hamburger bun and slather it with mayo. Set aside.
In a large bowl whisk three whole eggs (if you really care enough, only use the yolks) to foam with a little fresh lemon juice and a splash of water. Whisk your egg mixture into the bacon grease over very low heat. Whisk continuously for about five minutes. Remove from heat, salt it, and let thicken slightly.
Slap all that shit together and park your butt down for the big race. Eat it.
16 comments:
Dude, that shit needs some fresh ground pepper!
I put mine on an english muffin and add a slice of tomato. Good shit I tell ya, good shit.
If only there was "The Intimidator" branded onto a hollandaise instamix packet.
A google search turned up nothing...
My query resulted in 35,789,439 pages of what looks like your recipe but not on a plate.
I am failing to pick up what you are putting down UW...
That's cause I drink a lot before visiting your blog, but I was referencing your google search.
oh...I get it
I think...
Hey a customer of mine who has a lamb farm gave me a ton of short ribs. How do I cook these things and what should I season them with.
Lucky Bastard!!!
If you like spicy shit I would marinate them for 2-6 hours in harissa (http://cookingforassholes.blogspot.com/2009/04/garlic-fire-paste.html) then sprinkle with salt, pan fry until medium rare (cut them up first, dumbass), and then sprinkle with some cumin.
If you would prefer something milder I would just roast them with garlic, rosemary (FRESH!), and red onion (http://cookingforassholes.blogspot.com/2009/04/garlic-rosemary-grilled-lamb.html)
Here are also some sauces I enjoy with lamb...
Horseradish Mint:
http://cookingforassholes.blogspot.com/2009/05/horseradish-mint-sauce.html
Porter Mustard:
http://cookingforassholes.blogspot.com/2009/05/seared-lamb-with-porter-mustard.html
I have a pic of how I poach...how do I add that?
just email it to me...
what is it?
A picture of your microwave?
OMG I always say if you see Nascar a Bubba is around somewhere. Personally I hate Nascar.
PussDaddy
For the record I did receive an email from Mikey and although the picture was not of his microwave, it was of a contraption he purchased to poach eggs in his microwave.
NASCAR sucks...except when people die.
I think I just came a little... oh, wait... maybe a lot;)
Now I'm seriously fucking hungry so I'm going to stop going back and catching up on your gdeffing blog and fix the fam something to eat... hmph!
That's hot.
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