Tortured Baby Cow with a White Wine, Mushroom, and Shallot Deglaze

"How can you eat veal!?! Don't you know what that poor little creature has been through?" Of course I do. That's what makes it so damn delicious. I am a fierce predator who consumes weaker species to ensure my survival. Fuck, I would eat a California condor egg omelette with dolphin steak and beluga whale caviar if I had the chance. At least the baby cow's short painful existence was not in vain. Godspeed little buddy. Let's begin:

Dredge 1/2lb of veal scaloppini strips in flour that has been salt and peppered. Fry them up in some butter over medium heat for about 45 seconds per side. Put them on a plate, cover with tin foil and set aside. Add 2tbl minced shallot (it's a type of onion, stupid) and 8-10 sliced white mushrooms. Once the mushrooms change color, dump in 1/2c of the chardonnay you bought at the gas station and scrape all the delicious little bits off the bottom of the pan. Let it simmer uncovered until it reduces, about 10 minutes.

"That looks incredibly appetizing..." Shut up! It may not look pretty but it is fucking delicious. Let the sauce cool slightly to thicken and then spoon it over your prey. Garnish with freshly grated Parmesan and/or Italian parsley. You can just taste the pain. Eat it.