Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Huevos Americanos



Chorizo
Corn
Black Beans
White Onion
Lime Juice
Eggs
Corn Tortillas

With a title like this the dish should probably be a football sized microwave burrito that requires you to unhinge your jaw and deep throat it but I think burritos are stupid as fuck so I decided to rub my huevos all over some spicy meat tacos.  They may not be “moi authenticos” but I don’t live with 16 family members and my kitchen isn’t cluttered with a shitdickload of Baby Jesus and Virgin Mary candles either.       

Squeeze the pork entrails from the plastic tubing into a pan and fry them up until nice and browned.  Set aside.  Toss the corn, black beans, white onion, and lime juice.  Scramble some eggs.  While the eggs are cooking, warm up the corn tortillas on a dry pan over medium heat for about a minute per side. 

Assemble your tacos and top with cilantro.  It’s like Mexico all up in your mouth but without the drug violence and shitty accordion music.  If you are unable to control your pathetic fat American impulses, grab a flour tortilla the size of a dinner plate, dump everything in the center, add two cups of rice, an obscene amount of sour cream, and roll that shit up.  Eat it.

6 comments:

Adorably Dead said...

I think I could contain my fat American impulses just this once. Besides, size doesn't matter. ;p

Megan Nordyke said...

Only you can simultaneously insult my culture and my fiance's, and make me love you all the more for it.
I will make an argument for authenticity here: my mother in law, a sixth-generation New Mexican American, prizes ingenuity and authentic FLAVORS when she cooks. This is something I could see her cooking. So I really think that the flavors here are authentic, and that makes the dish authentic to me.

tender b. said...

These would be even better if you did have all those candles. Think about what you could do with them...

Anonymous said...

wait, im confused...where do i toss the corn and shit? in the trash? wtf man, i spent my good money on that shit! but if you say so....

indiecognition said...

When will you do an authentic Mexican dish? You know, something wrapped in foil and thrown directly onto the grill. Burnt aluminum is the most Mexican of all aromas, except for diarrhea.

jimi said...

I guess this info is totally unique. pork chop recipes